I have struggled for twelve years to prove myself worthy in the food manufacturing arena of my job. I am the only female in my peer group of managers. For years I was not included in my boss's staff meetings. All the men managers were, but not me. I wasn't included in his status report to his boss, but all the men were. I'm also the only manager in his group that is not a senior manager. All the men are.
I've felt this type of incidental differential since I began in this position. I'm an extremely strong female, but am continuously amazed at how small I can feel due to the inequality. At one staff meeting once, one of the peer managers (senior of course) made a comment about whether or not shopping at the outlet qualified for our advancement training. Not sure why he felt inclined to say that to me, especially in front of the others. But it hurt more than I can convey in words.
The reason I bring this all to light is that it happened again yesterday. I was called into my boss's office for a briefing of the staff meeting I missed yesterday morning. He explained to me that he had a project for me. I LOVE PROJECTS. I love being in control of them, and of being able to shine through them. How wrong I was. He wants me to decorate some garbage cans for a gimmick training he is doing.
Now I'm pretty sure he wouldn't ask any of the men in my group to do this. And I feel completely demoralized. I work SO hard to be taken seriously, only to be asked to do an arts and crafts project. And this isn't the first time. He's asked me to sort things, make copies, etc., all of which would never be asked of the men.
I hate that I am so completely underappreciated and utilized. I am a very adept, smart, and capable manager, who will spend next week making cute garbage cans.
No comments:
Post a Comment