vacation

So the family spent four days last week on vacation. I cannot express how much it means to me to have so much fun just hanging out with my DH and kids. Some of my favorite moments...

• the kids hanging out in the hammock TOGETHER horsing around
• sitting by the fire with DH
• getting a hole in one at putt putt
• playing goofy arcade games with DS
• realizing at the same moment as DD that the "boutique" we were in was a wee bit beyond our means, and exiting quickly
• playing in the sand of Lake Michigan
• sitting outside watching a movie at the drive in with DD - counting the shooting stars - we saw NINE!

It was just so awesome to have no agenda, but just do fun things for a few days. DD will be out of the house in two years, and its moments like these that I will cherish my whole life.

home at last..

Wow, the last three weeks have been a whirlwind. The last week the busiest of them all. After a wonderful weekend getaway with my DH, we took the kids to Door County, a beautiful little piece of Wisconsin, to go camping for four days. Needless to say, I'm wiped.

I am continuing to enjoy my reconnection with several friends from our class reunion. Seriously reconnect. Emailing, chatting, and planning some get-togethers. What an awesome thing this has become. We had some amazing friends back then - and now!

Having not really been home for the last two weeks, I have a lot to catch up on this week. Need to get back into my FLYlady routine - get the house (and my life) back on schedule. I NEED ROUTINE.

DS has his first ever football practice tonight. He's pretty excited. Dad's pretty excited. Heck, I'M pretty excited. I'm a big football fan, so this is something I've wanted to see my entire life. My DS playing. WOO HOO. Hope he likes it!

We are nearing the time to put my dad in a nursing home. I went to see him at lunch, having been gone for 5 days. It wasn't one of his better days. Definitely not. So I know that the home is the right place for him, but that doesn't make it any eaiser...

I realized that once dad is in the home, and the house is sold, I will have nothing to do at lunch. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I don't live in the town I work in. So every day for the last 16 years, I've gone to my parents house at lunch when I didn't have other plans. On average, four times a week. What am I going to do on my lunch hours once the house is sold? I really don't want to start working through lunch. I don't want to get in the habit of shopping every day at lunch either. I'm thinking I'll take my lunches at the library - - - read my books.

Weird, to all of a sudden be faced with this reality. My daily life will be more affected by this move than any of my siblings - who don't live here. For them, it means visiting dad somewhere else. They lost that attachment to the homestead years ago. I don't know if I'm ready to do that...

on being a grown up

Being a grown up sucks. Two years ago I had to issue DNR orders to allow my mom to die. Today I had to have my dad sign papers to enter the King Veterans Home. Days like these are SO hard. I'm only 38. Having to deal with aging parents has been so much harder than I ever imagined. Mix that in with taking care of a teenager and a son, and it's so taxing.

Dad is ready to leave the house, but not to enter a home. It is so hard to try to explain. He just doesn't remember or understand things. Some days he doesn't realize Mom is gone and it's been two years.

I realized that now that the papers are signed, and he has his doctor appt in early September, that he could be in the home by mid-sept. I realize now how much I'm going to miss taking care of him. While it's so much mental strain and work, I have come to enjoy my lunches over there. They've become a way of life.

Dad's only going to be an hour away, but I know that it will be much further between visits. I've said from the beginning that I worry that my visits will become so much fewer. Taking care of him has insured my time with him.

While days are hard - especially having to relive mom's last days to help him remember - they've also been fun. It's great listening to his stories. It's fun when he cracks a joke. We discuss world events, and family. I go over every detail of my vacations with him - as he lives through me.

I guess today I realized just how much of a Blessing the last years (16) have been - coming back here to take care of both Mom and Dad. I wouldn't trade them in for the world. Many (including some family) looked down on me for moving back - feel I've not lived to my potential. I realize now my greatest potential was in the last 16 years. What a gift.

Another monday!

Trying to recoup after an amazing long weekend with the DH. He swept me off on the Harley for a three day get away - up around the northern tip of Lake Michigan, down into lower Michigan - for an amazing Kid Rock concert - outside, on the side of the hill. Very "woodstock" if you will. We rode the bike (only a true fan rides 800 miles on a Harley to go to an outdoor concert), and had a fantastic time. (Although today I'm walking a little bow legged!)

Weekends like this really refresh a person. Getting away from the kids - from the responsibilities at home. It was long overdue and needed. Only downside is packing for the two of us for three days on a cycle... I got might sick of those jeans!

Cking the blog today - I'm really surprised at how many readers I have. I hope I'm not disappointing anyone! One of my short term goals is to start added more pix. Just haven't had time to download any from the summer. And I have lots....

Another short week - only working two days - then off to Door County with the family. So I'll have two LONG days, but knowing it's a short week makes it all worth it!

laughing

Tons of random thoughts are still running through my head from my reunion...

If there is one thing that stands out, it is laughing. People's laughs really define them. And with some people (Rachel!) it's just such a genuine laugh, it warms your heart.

We did a LOT of laughing this last weekend. So much so that I had absolutely no voice for four days. Today it's becoming a comeback, but still pretty raspy.

Anyway - I have great visuals in my head of people breaking into full blown laughter. SD was keeping everyone on their toes, her energy blasting everyone within 2 ft. Saturday night - I actually laughed so hard a couple of times that I thought I'd pass out from lack of o2.

At the end of the evening, we went to the martini lounge (yes, I'm still in my biker clothes), and sat there reminiscing over the geeky stuff we did in HS, and every story ended up in knee-slapping laughter.

What an amazing thing - to get together after all these years, and have that common ground that lends itself to geniunely enjoying each other's company. I guess it helps to have us to laugh at - we're pretty geeky.

coming out.

This weekend was my coming out party. In a way. It was my twenty year class reunion. I left high school as a brain, a non-drinker, a violin player, an actor, National Honor Society president, blah, blah, blah.

Meeting my husband was the best thing that ever happened to me. My husband is a biker. Not the pedal kind, the motor kind. Harley to be exact. We have an amazing life together enjoying our bike - traveling, getting away. It is by far the best thing that ever came into my life (that wasn't a person).

Back to the reunion. Saturday was a memorial ride for a dear friend of mine - who lost her son to suicide. I knew that if I chose to ride in the ride, I would not only be late for the reunion, but have to go straight there - in my biker clothes.

You have to realize that 90% of my former classmates had no idea that I was a biker. So fashionably late, I walked in - Harley bandana, jeans, and boots. Mixed in with the stilleto heels, the fancy dresses, you name it.

Now I've never really been one to be shy, or introverted, so being the only biker b()&^ there, I wasn't about to become a quiet wallflower. I threw my goggles on my head - and jumped in feet first. I was out. Closet wild woman no more.

segue

Ok, so work sucks. But this weekend I had my twenty year class reunion - and I think I probably have a half dozen blogs that will spew themselves out in the next few days as I reflect....

So sit back, put your feet up, and enjoy the ride!!!